– A quick guide to getting screwed –
Speed 10 km/h or more over the limit and you’re screwed.
Drive with any concentration of alcohol in your blood and you’re screwed.
Exceed 100 km/h and you’re screwed.
No visibile P-Plates on the front and rear of your vehicle and you’re screwed.
Drive with dope, speed or ecstasy in your blood or saliva and you’re screwed.
Four or more demerit points on your provisional licence and you’re screwed.
Drive a high powered vehicle under the age of 25 without a full driver’s licence and you’re screwed.
Use any mobile phone function while driving and you’re screwed.
– You know you're screwed when –
Screwed Situation #1
After lining up for 10 minutes in the rain the drive thru girl says “sorry, we don’t serve pedestrians.
Screwed Situation #2
Mum refuses to drop you off around the corner.
Screwed Situation #3
You attempt to chat up the girls in the car next to you on rollerblades.
Screwed Situation #4
You’re caught in an electrical storm, you’re half way home and you’re on a bike.
Screwed Situation #5
The creepy guy on the bus has just made eye contact.
Screwed Situation #6
The stranger you’ve just hitched a ride with asks whether you’ve seen the movie Wolf Creek.
Screwed Situation #7
You wake up in the back of the taxi to discover that the driver thought you said Goolwa, not Gawler.
Screwed Situation #8
The only person who can take you to Summernats is grandma.
Screwed Situation #9
The shopping trolley you’ve been using to move house with has developed a wheel wobble.
Screwed Situation #10
You keep catching your hot date staring at your helmet hair.
Screwed Situation #11
You find yourself buying shoes for comfort not design.